After finishing The Fountainhead a few months ago, I would have to recommend this book to anyone and everyone I know. It was amazing.

I don’t believe there could have been a better time in my life that I could have read this book. Personally I’ve been battling some mild depression stemming mostly from unfulfilling work experiences and trying to better understand some interpersonal issues with my family and friends. I’ve been wanting more acceptance, more appreciation, more guidance,…more achievements in the eyes of others. How selfless of me.

Most of my 26 years on this earth I’ve felt I was independent, honest, and intelligent. Prior to college my happiness lied in the hands of my parents – is Dad going to be sober tonight so he can appreciate me? Is Mom going to nit pick and critique everything I do today? How can I help them solve their problems so they can stop arguing? I was completely dependent on Mom and Dad in a way a child should not be after adolescence. I constantly lied to myself about how I felt.

I was self seeking at times – but most of the time I was concerned with making everyone else happy. If I could do that and make myself happy that was great, but given the choice, I would choose others happiness over myself

Moving to GA to go to Georgia Tech was a huge step and milestone in my life. It was against the desires of my friends and family, but at that point something in me knew I had to get away and be on my own. I had to stop living through others; I had to stop being a second-hander.

During college the shift slowly began. I had the opportunity to start over, with no friends, no family, no one who knew me anywhere in sight. When I have no one to rely on I do not seek out an ally, I seek my own desires – I become selfish. I’m not afraid to ask questions, I’m not scared of being viewed negatively. When I’m in a situation with no support I can fully support myself. I completely satisfy my self.

Despite my growth in college, I met and dated a Peter Keating for almost 2 years. I allowed myself to suffer at the sake of his happiness. I allowed this because I viewed forgiveness as a virtue. I viewed my own pain as less meaningful than his happiness. Despite moving on, for years I blamed him, but truly there is no one to blame but myself. I wasn’t happy because I allowed someone else to control my happiness. When I viewed the situation for what it truly was, it didn’t even make sense. In the same rite, I should have never blamed the Peter Keating I dated - how can you blame someone who has no self?

I was not aware of my constant desire for approval until it was pointed it out a few years ago. Here I thought I was completely and utterly independent. Look at everything I’ve done! Look at all I’ve accomplished! Look at my achievements! Look, Look LOOK! While I was/am independent, I was completely dependent on how those closest in my life viewed me. While I felt I was pursuing only my own desires – I also sought approval from others. I don’t believe I’ve ever been a complete second-hander, but I’ve come very close to it.

The Fountainhead was a wake-up call of what I’ve always wanted to be, what I have been and what I am to become. It was also phenomenally written and a wonderful story.

I recommend.

Read the rest of this entry »

My boyfriend and I decided we wanted to adopt a cat. We both wanted some sort of animal and we have a very small townhouse with little to no yard so a dog was out of the question. I tend to not like a lot of cats, but I love kittens. My only stipulation was that we adopt a kitten so I can see how cute it was and remember that when it gets to be a big, fat, mean cat.

I started to look around, thinking we should go to a shelter and save some poor kitty from being euthenized. As it turns out, there are no shelters you can just go to adopt a cat. I found one or two that were open to the public with “adoption hours” but they all recommended that you fill out an application online prior to visiting.

I came across Furkids.org and I found an adorable kitten who I just had to have. I submitted an application early December. I asked for assistance from my boyfriend because he has actually owned a cat, whereas I had not. The questions were pretty standard and made sense - “Where will the cat sleep?”, “Will the cat be allowed outside?”, “Do you plan to declaw?”, etc. We answered all of the questions honestly and submitted our application. A few days later I received a call from Furkids and the woman was not happy. She immediately went into a tirade about declawing and was I aware of how much trauma that could cause the cat? “Of course, ” I replied, “…which is why we aren’t going to declaw”. She didn’t seem to have heard that statement or read my application because she was somehow under the impression that I did, in fact, want to chop up their cute little kitty paws.

After the Furkids incident we decided to try a couple other adoption routes, most resulted in filling out an application and the person receiving the application not liking our answers. One such application question and follow up conversation went something like this:

Question: Will the cat be indoors or outdoors?
Us: Whatever the cat chooses.
Response: WHAT????? Are you aware that it’s illegal to let cats outside without a fenced in backyard and leash? Most people think this just applies to dogs but it applies to cats too here in GA.
Us: Oh, really? We didn’t know. Okay, well that settles that, the cat will stay inside.
Response: I’ve spoken with foster parent of the cat you were looking to adopt, and I’m sorry but neither she nor I feel comfortable allowing you to adopt this cat due to the fact that this cat was rescued in an ally where he was left outside to die. I’m sorry, you cannot adopt this cat.

After that we were flabbergasted and almost gave up. FurKids.org by far had the best website , easy to navigate and great pictures, which is probably why we ended up trying it one more time. We were finally successful. We adopted two beautiful, adorable, cuddly kitties Even though they are close to 10 months old now, and no longer kitten size, I still find them cute (yay!!).

Jack and Luna